{ Set them free.

Sunday, April 15, 2007

{ freed on 23:55

this week is reading week.meaning its time to read ur books..notes..wadeva there is to be read for a thing called..EXAMS..this means i will be a zombie..have lack of sleep again..haiz...
today such a wen xin day..mum cooked lunch for us..yummy been so long since i had homecooked food..then dad cooked chicken soup for me to nourish my toot toot brain..haha..feel so happy that there are people out there who are so willing to do things for me..thou these few days i have been moody towards them but they do understand the pressure that i am experiencing..mum oso made effort to stay home with me over the wkends while i tried to study..haha..went grocery shopping and bought many food..haha..time to pig out..well i have yet to find a nice place to study out yet..soon i will find out tmr..hehe...

got back our space proj..rather satisfied with the grade given that we rushed the report out in 3 days...haha..a bit slipshod thou..

nothing interesting in my life since xiaogu's 21st bdae..

probably just wishing that sch semester ends soon..and that i will be flying off after exams..i just wan to leave this sad sad place..this stressful place..

everybody jiayou studying okie..

but one extra thing this semester is that..things for us has yet to be settled and its kinda bothering..when things were thought to have settled after that day's talk in the car..everything just pours out again..and the story begins again..all the unhappiness with each other..the biggest and most f*** matter is our communication skill really does sux...nothing worst can happen other than that..just wanting the good stuffs to happen but yet they need to be expressed instead of being implied..well in the end..nothing is done..just end up in fights again..well mayb wad was meant to be was never meant to be..at least up till now...i really detest this whole issue..the cert..the promise..the reliance..the compromising..everything was never real at all..rather they had remained as a pack of lies and still be immersed in that fantasy world whereby everything would have been happier..everything that was promised had been done and not words of "i cant do it"...yah both of us were never like that in the past..everything has changed..probably even feelings and love has been converted to hate and detestment..irritance..probably..maybe we just no longer love each other..why..why cant i just have wad i want and u will have wad u want to...soon probably when u no longer have the chance to see me..mayb then u will miss me and regret..but probably again..mayb none of that will happen..mayb no sign of lingering and ponders and misses at all..well at least i never cried again..cos teh hurt is already there and i dun think any more hurt will make me more hurt..like i always say and mayb you do agree with me that i already understand u too well..that i do noe wad ur every move is..even thou i wish i can tell u outright wad i hope for..but cant u even imply and do sth extraordinary..yah i wan you to lead but yet i wan everything my way..even u do gt frustrated over that and it is a obstacle that u cant accept at all..giving in to me is such a hurdle..then i guess..really probably there is nothing taht holds two of us together anymore..
recently i just decipher that i had actually brought unto u much misery and torture..making u do things that u dun really want..or rather things that do obstruct the intend matters that u wanted to do..probably us being together 2 yrs ago is a real mistake..thou we had been happy before..well think there will be a girl out there that i truly the girl of your dreams..and that girl surely isnt me..